5 Ways to Bring the Spark Back in your Relationship

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Reignite the Spark you once shared.


In relationships it’s easy to lose the spark after a while. We’ve all been there.

We meet the perfect match for us. The connection is instant. You meet, go on dates and you can’t stop talking, laughing and connecting on life, dreams, friendships and all the things you have in common.

You end up falling for each other based on every factor that brought the sparks to each conversation and interaction you share through a romantic connection.

Looking back at past relationships it can be easy to see where it all went wrong. I was in a long term relationship like every one of us, that at first I couldn't get enough of. But after years together I had to let it go because our spark that connected us in our beginning got lost.

I think that if we could have put the work in before it all went wrong it would have changed our ending. Even though we were not meant to be, putting the effort of trying to fix a relationship can actually save you from unneeded pain. I could have handled my emotions a lot better and possibly could have ended our journey with a lot more respect.

In the relationship I have now I am a lot more aware of what it takes so I do my best everyday to be sweet, silly, supportive and upbeat like I was from the start without letting the day to day struggles change my attitude toward him.

Its normal for the first few months to shine so bright you’re blinded by the idea of perfection.

How perfect you are for each other, how perfect it is that you both like the same music, love to travel to the same places, and both want two kids.

You start envisioning a future together and all the things you want to do, the life you want to create. Then months pass, possibly more and you have your first fight, then the next. How do you handle it? How can you bring back that spark you had on that third date. The ones you had the first time you kissed.

Most people call it the honeymoon phase but I am a firm believer that the honeymoon phase can last way longer than you think or let it.

Here are 5 ways you can bring the spark back into your relationship without having to give up on the love you created.

1. Think back to what it was that first made you get the butterflies.

 Whether it was his smile, or the way he smelled so good on that second date. The way he listened so carefully to your stories about your friends. Or the way he went out of his way to plan a cute date. Looking back at what first got you to fall for this guy can actually bring back feel good feelings.

It helps you remember why it is you made it this far. The fact that you liked him as a person first not just as your relationship partner but as a friend is something we often forget. Let’s see our man as friends first and have some compassion for your relationship before giving up on it. 

2. Plan Dates they help you bond.

Trying something new together is the best way to reconnect and bring back the sparks. It helps you to experience a moment you never had or shared with another person that brings good vibes and happiness to the day or night. Trying a new restaurant in your town then going to comedy club or paint night can help you let loose and enjoy yourself. Plan a date night 2x a month.

Switch it up and have each of you plan one date night each month for fun. Having fun together, talking to each other and reflecting on how far you’ve come in the good times can bring smiles and laughter to why you fell for one another in the first place.


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3. Create traditions together.

Whether it’s going to the same place you met on your first date every year on that day, whether you watch a favorite show together every Thursday or train for the same 5k together every year to support a cause you both support. Sharing your own tradition creates that bond of caring for one another. Knowing that you care enough to remember what you both enjoy brings back that spark you both share.

4. Support each other every day.

Being in a relationship can have it’s ups and downs day. The goal is to have a lot more ups. We have to remember that we are both living in this life and are supposed to be our own individuals. You deserve a relationship that supports what makes your soul happy. As well as you should support your guys needs and feelings too.

A couple that believes in one another and supports each another makes for a solid committed relationship. It feels great to know that you are supported with love and kindness. It helps inspire you to be better for yourself and your relationship.

5. Be more intimate and spontaneous.

Remember to enjoy lots of hugs and kisses. Often a couple can become too comfortable with each other. The only kisses they give are when they say hello or goodbye and hug once in a while.

Don’t get too routine. Physical touch brings out happy and calming endorphins. It takes both of you to make your relationship be its best.

Be spontaneous when it comes to physical touch. Make sure to act on it and put effort into having time for that physical connection you both need.

You can’t let weeks go by and not have a cuddle session or make love.

Embrace the connection being made with each passionate kiss. Putting effort into intimacy can bring back that sexual attraction you both had when it was all new.

After you start being more intimate you easily start getting that natural glow and the things that bother you about each other start to feel less serious as before.

Remember all relationships take effort. Allow yourselfs to put the effort it

takes to reignite the love you chose to have and share. No matter what happens if you practice these skills, you know that you tried to make things better.

Now it’s up to both of you to see if that spark can continue to shine from now on between you two.


Do you know what it’s like to feel like the spark is gone? Are you at a point in your relationship where things don’t feel the same?

Let me know what you think in the comments below. How would you use these skills to make your relationship better?